No I’m not anti-valentine. I’m simply anti tackiness. It’s okay, except it makes it harder to be with a hopeless romantic like Matthew. I broke his heart last year because I didn’t bother sending him a card for the occasion even though he sent one to me a week earlier and expected me to return the favor although he knew that I don’t participate in Hallmark holidays. See the difficulty?
To make matter worse, I was scheduled to work overtime to entertain a certain journalist of his favourite UK newspaper no less. As a joke, I put it up on Facebook that “my Valentine” was that Mr. Senior Editor. Apparently, it wasn’t very funny for my Editor-in-chief boyfriend.
This year, I made it clear to Matthew once again: I don’t do Valentine’s. He still insisted for whatever reason to treat me with a present. As a CFO of the house I ruthlessly DENIED him the budget, Suze Orman style!
As the day approaching, he was still itching about getting me something and I was then worried that if I don’t reciprocate, I’d break his heart again. Bad girlfriend!
Inspired by one of our favourite shows, 30Rock, I told Matthew: okay, we can give each other something but only if it’s a zero-dollar gift.
I secretly signed up to donate flower arrangement for the church. For that, I got a space in a church bulletin for the Sunday my flowers are displayed. I chose to do it for Sunday the 12th and used the space as a tribute to romance.
To try and impress me with his zero-dollar gift, he had an idea for one of my idols, Kimora Lee Simmons, to tweet me something. How did I know this plan? I actually read his tweet to @OfficialKimora asking her to mention me. I didn’t want to ruin his surprise so I didn’t say anything.
The morning of Feb 14, he kissed me and said, “A surprise is coming!” I couldn’t help but say, “I read your tweet.” He was baffled. “How can you read it? I thought if I only sent it to someone, other people can’t read it!”
One, he should have sent her a direct message. Two, KLS didn’t tweet to me at all. Three, I doubt that she could even read Matt’s tweet because his tweets are protected.
He did get me a cute card that he left on my bedside table, the one I just tidied up the day before as a response to his complaint. Oh, the joy of cohabitation.
I spent the day running errands, getting one painful slimming massage, and shoe shopping with a friend. When I got home at about 3 o’clock in the afternoon, I was torn: should I continue my overdue editing work or should I start cooking a special two-course dinner for Matthew? (Aside: Special here means healthy, as opposed to cups of instant noodles we used to consume unapologetically.)
I was just starting up my computer when I got his text, “I’ll be home at 5.” I thought, now THAT’s the best zero-dollar gift I could have hoped for. I turned my computer to sleep and started peeling the carrots.
We had soup, followed by stir-fried beef over very small portion of rice. We drank tea (naturally, it was 5pm) and bitched about the world. Romantic*.
*) Just for the record I’m not being sarcastic.