I can’t speak for Matthew but my answer is: married life (so far) is so much calmer and so much more fun.
It’s calm because we have had our fair share of fights and necessary friction when we were just engaged. Well, to be fair, we had fights since the first time we had to share a bathroom. But yeah, the disagreements were settled before we’re married.
We’re also blessed to have the opportunity to live together 3 months before the wedding. Some would argue that cohabiting out-of-wedlock would drive the couple to break up or lead to a fail marriage. But we decided to live together after we’re engaged. So 1) there’s no tension for whether or not he was going to propose; 2) living together was not “to test the water” or “an alternative to marriage”.
If you ask me, it was mostly logistical reasons, as I decided to move to Jakarta 3 months before the wedding. It was a bit pointless for me to get my own apartment merely 12 weeks before the big matrimonial move-in. But I will post a separate story on what we think on that subject matter, so let’s skip any questions or judgement on this one ya!
Back to the topic. Yeah it is more fun because we get to do more stuff as husband and wife. We started a bible study group with our pastor and other couples. We have road trips with the extended family. The Indonesian ones first and hopefully in a few months the British ones. Of course, we get to have our own travels together. In April alone, we travelled (back) to Bali for a weekend, to Singapore for a few days and this month we will go to Cebu, Philippines.
As much as I enjoyed solo travelling, I love having Matthew by my side, if for no other reason than having someone to kill time with during unreasonable 2-hour wait at the airport. By the way, whoever said “it is not about the destination but the journey” is wrong! Try being delayed from 7PM flight to 5AM only for a 90-minute flight. Or try running for your life through arrival – baggage claim – check in – immigration – gate ONLY because your connection flight is going to leave you ONLY because your first leg flight was delayed. Or simply try sleeping in a security guard post on a deportation episode.
Anyway, it is always better to have somebody with you. And when s/he is annoying, just move to another row. Hehe.
So, there is your answer: married life is good. Not just because you won’t likely to die alone, but also because you won’t have to LIVE alone.